Steps Tell Stories: Sebastian Pasinetti

We're in conversation with Sebastian Pasinetti: cook, writer, counsellor in training and now, Head of Marketing at Yolk Group. Raised in a family of chefs, Sebastian learnt early that food is the easiest way to connect with people. This instinct took him from a work experience placement to opening a restaurant with his mum and into the pages of Broadsheet, Sitchu, Urban List and Melbs Insider. Today, we're at Rocco's Bologna on Gertrude Street, a few doors down from our Fitzroy store and the restaurant Sebastian collaborated with for Broadsheet's Dine Out. For Sebastian, cooking, writing and mental health have always been part of the same path.

Rollie: Let's start a little bit around your background in hospitality. You're a cook, a writer, starting to be a counsellor. Tell us a little bit about yourself and what steps brought you here today.

"I started in hospitality when I was 15. In Year 10 you have to do a week of work experience and I did mine at a restaurant. It was so eye-opening how fun the environment was and the connection to food and to people. That's an intersection I've found myself developing more and more into.

Both my parents were chefs. I lost my dad last year, but he was a chef too. My mum is an amazing cook. They gave me the foundation for wanting to get into this industry. 

People ask me all the time how I found myself in three really different industries. But for me, it's all one and the same. You can't talk about mental health without talking about people, then thinking about how best to serve them, whether that's an event, a supper club or a wedding you're catering. Telling stories, providing food, breaking bread around a table. They seem really separate, but they're actually one and the same. I'm just glad I've found a niche that feels true to who I am, the family I grew up in and the community I surround myself with." 

Rollie: Our campaign's called Steps Tell Stories, because it's about the steps we take in our lives. What are some of the steps you've taken in your life that you're like, 'This actually completely changed the trajectory of my life and has been so important to me'?

"Travel was a really important one. I've lived in Spain, Sydney and London. Collectively, they've shaped who I am today and how I engage with the world. Travel opened my eyes to different cultures and different ways of being.

Another step was to stop giving so much of a fuck. Our generation grew up with our parents' influence of "stand up straight, these are your fancy clothes, these are your going-out shoes". All these little ideas about how we have to be. Letting go of that and leaning into who I am and how I want to show up has opened more doors than the refined version of myself ever did. That was a performance, really."

Rollie: You've spoken a lot about how your mum has been a massive influence in your life. What are some of the things that she's taught you and what do you take with you every day? What is it you learn from her as a coach? How important is family to you and that family connection?

"Growing up in Melbourne's north-eastern suburbs, going to a mostly white school and having a white mum, she really taught my siblings and me to use our hands to connect with people. Food always felt like a really good way to do that.

She taught me not to follow recipes. To trust my instinct, my hands and my senses: my smell, my sight. If it doesn't look right, it's probably not going to taste good. Most of the philosophy in my life has come from experience rather than someone telling me what something should be or how to show up. She taught us to trust ourselves and trust our gut.

My family is maybe the most important thing in my life. Growing up queer and a person of colour in this part of the world was challenging. But I have a twin sister who's also queer and a person of colour and sharing that was really special. Our mum rallied behind us. She was a real force of social justice for us. My two younger siblings have always celebrated us, even when they didn't have all the answers. They never questioned it.

That set a benchmark for how I'll allow myself to be treated and how I treat other people. My heart breaks for people who don't have that behind them. But community can do the same thing. You get the same result. It's just about finding those people." 

Rollie: What's a time where you've said to yourself 'Oh, I don't know if this is right', but it actually has really panned out for you in the right way?

"Probably opening a restaurant with my mum. She'd worked in senior roles in venues around Melbourne and London and one day she just said, "Let's open a restaurant." It felt so left field. I don't know if, in the moment, it looked right. Even the venue didn't look right at the time. But it felt really great. We found our groove and it was the start of my career. So many doors have opened for us since. That's the one time the look didn't match the feeling."

Rollie: We're here today at Rocco's Bologna. In July, you collaborated with Rocco's and chef, Kyle Nicol, for Broadsheet Dine Out. You are constantly collaborating with different people. What is it you look for when you do these collaborations? Who are the kind of people and organisations you want to work with and what inspires you? 

"A foundation of ethics comes first. I wouldn't partner with a venue that doesn't look after its staff. Even with my writing for Broadsheet, I've started turning down commissions where I don't feel aligned with the person I'm interviewing or where the story isn't fair or just.

Then creativity: I want to know we're aligned on where an event or collaboration is going creatively. And then a bit of fun. I'm not a super serious person. I never went to university, so writing and cooking have all come from passion and from people who opened the door for me. Fun is such a cringey thing to say but I think we've lost the essence of how to have fun as a society, especially our generation.

Teaching mental health first aid opened my eyes to how lonely most people are. A connection to something outside yourself really matters, whether that's seeing yourself represented, having creative input or going to a dinner where a dish reminds you of your Nonna's cooking or a summer in Sicily. If we kept that in the back of our minds as we moved through the world, I think we'd all be a lot better off."

Rollie: Obviously, you are a storyteller as a writer. What are some of the stories that have had the most impact on you?

"I interviewed Tony from T. Cavallaro & Sons. He was probably more passionate than I am, and I'm quite passionate in this space. To see a family business passed down with such care, integrity and love was so inspiring, especially after running venues with my mum. So much of my work revolves around family and how we lift each other up. The Cavallaros do that in such an authentic way.

Another is Georgie, who opened a taco shop called Super Taco. She'd worked in hospitality marketing and PR for 20 years, felt stagnant and wanted to back herself and build something to pass on to her three kids. She quit her job and spent months researching how to make the perfect tortilla. It's only two ingredients but she's one of two restaurants in Victoria making their own. A lot of people take parts of other cultures and monetise them in a way that feels icky. She's done it in such a thoughtful, intentional way, celebrating the cuisine rather than taking from it. That's really important for where food is heading." 

Rollie: If there was one value or a feeling that you want people to have when they interact with you, what is that?

"Openness. I really appreciate when someone can come to me completely themselves and value the time we're going to spend together. A lot of collaborations and industry crossovers can feel performative, like you're doing it for tickets or revenue or the bottom line. Then you lose the point of community. When people come open, I tell a better story, the event is better and you feel better after it. That's the mental health plug at the end." 

Sebastian was captured at Rocco's Bologna as part of our Steps Tell Stories campaign. Sebastian wears our Boat Step in Black Croc.